Chili Bean Song Parody

Posted in Currenthoughts by Brooke Trout

The following is a song parody of Michael Jackson’s Billie Jean called Chili Bean, written for the second episode of Foodsotros for the KC Universal Network. You can listen to the full song parody here: https://podcasts.kcuniversal.net/foodsotros/episode-002-chili

CHILI BEAN by Brooke Trout (dedicated to Sean Dunson)
It was more like a soup thing
from a cannery
I had one bite
but there was no bean
I was not done
I would place
in a bowl
in a mound
They sold me a can of chili beans
at the store you see
then I’d be fed with a dish
so sweet taste on my tongue
I would place
in a bowl
in a mound
Mamma always told me
be careful with this food
Don’t go around making stinky farts (don’t make no farts)
But with a heaping bowl beside me
I can smell this tasty food
I can take a taste for you
I can eat it till I’m through
Chili beans are not my supper
they’re just legumes that
try to pass as my lunch
but the beef adds a nice touch
For 40 tastes and for 40 bites
cheese was on just right
But who can stand
a food when its bland
hot sauce to blend
You can place
in a bowl
in a mound
Take tomatoes and dice
Just remember to always add spice
(Don’t add spice- do add spice ooh!)
You said my chili
would fill belly
and be so tasty
I had a bowlful
my chili tried
the meal was so fine
That I placed
in a bowl
in a mound
Momma always told me
be careful with this food
don’t go around making stinky farts
but with a toilet bowl beside me
I am ready for this food
I can take the heat its true
You know the chili shoots right through
Chili beans are not my supper
They’re just legumes that
try to pass as my lunch
I knew I ate too much
No, no ooh ooh ooh